GRIND YOUR BEANS FOOL!

Here at GreatFuckingCoffee.com, we sell one coffee variety at a time. We scour the globe for the best beans, roast them to perfection, put them in a bag with the word "fuck" on it and ship it off to you. When checking out from our online store, you can choose whole beans or ground (either for french press or drip). But! Even though we will sell you ground beans, we don't want you to order them that way.  

If you aren't drinking the full 12oz of coffee we're sending you within seven days, you shouldn't dabble in the pre-ground stuff. (Unless, of course, you really don't give a shit about drinking great fucking coffee – and in that case, what the fuck are you even doing here?)

So... why so hostile to pre-ground coffee?

Ground coffee starts to loose its flavor and aroma within minutes and starts to go stale within days. For truly GREAT COFFEE, you GOTS to grind your own beans. You grind the coffee from whole beans right before you make it. It's simple. Just put some beans in the grinder, give it a few taps, and pour the grounds into whatever coffee system you are using. You may need practice to get the consistency right for your preferred coffee system, but you'll figure it out quickly. I believe in you!

Its not rocket science,.. and any simple grinder will do. Don't get sucked into a shopping hole on Amazon looking at high dollar grinders. I've been using the same  Black and Decker mini grinder for 15 years at home and it's been perfect. 

This is one of the reasons that we sell 12oz bags. We want the coffee you drink to be roasted and IF YOU INSIST,... ground fresh. We make it super easy to re-order and even have a subscription option. So you've got no excuses to drink shitty stale coffee.

So if you don't have one already, get off your ass and get yourself a coffee grinder. Your mouth will be glad you did.* 

*DO NOT PUT YOUR MOUTH ON THE COFFEE GRINDER DUMMY